Countdown: 8

In 8 days I board a plane in Oklahoma City that will take me two hours away from Washington D.C.(Come on, did you really think that I would post where I'll be living on here?) ;) I will be an intern for a year with a ministry called Teen Challenge. I won't go too in depth because it would take a long time to explain all about Teen Challenge! However, if you would like to know more about the history, you can click here.

A link to my testimony can be found here.

Today is Mother's Day. It is also my farewell with my family today. I've never been away from home, aside from my time as a student in Teen Challenge. Which, let's face it, was not like being away from home. While I'll still have guidance and counsel, I'll have much more responsibility and freedom. It takes the right person for those two things to coincide, but I know I am up for the challenge, no matter how scary.

Lately I've been really stressed. I'm trying to find someone to takeover my lease on my apartment, packing, going to class and studying for finals. In all of that I've slipped up. I've lost focus on the goal that God has set before me. I've been praying and seeking wise counsel and going to church, but I haven't really RUN after God with everything I have like I used to. And I am ashamed. I gave Satan a foothold by letting everyday life become more important than my walk with Christ. I've done this over the past couple of weeks and I've really noticed a difference in my life.

 I don't think people realize what life is like without Christ. I don't know if I've really and truly known that place. That sense of complete confusion, loss, and just... Emptiness? I was raised with a belief in God but it wasn't until I started participating in my youth group that I really knew what a relationship with Him was like. I want to be that girl in middle school and early years of high school again that was so on fire for God and that so longed to draw nearer to Him that I would BEG my mother to take me to church! Where did that girl go? The girl that was 2 months away from graduating from Teen Challenge? Where is she, because I want to find her again!

I just opened up my Bible to Psalm 28 and read it and I couldn't hold back my tears. God always knows what I need without fail!

1To you, Lord, I call;

you are my Rock,

do not turn a deaf ear to me.

For if you remain silent,

I will be like those who go down to the pit.

2Hear my cry for mercy

as I call to you for help,

as I lift up my hands

toward your Most Holy Place.

3Do not drag me away with the wicked,

with those who do evil,

who speak cordially with their neighbors

but harbor malice in their hearts.

4Repay them for their deeds

and for their evil work;

repay them for what their hands have done

and bring back on them what they deserve.

5Because they have no regard for the deeds of the Lord

and what his hands have done,

he will tear them down

and never build them up again.

6Praise be to the Lord,

for he has heard my cry for mercy.

7The Lord is my strength and my shield;

my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.

My heart leaps for joy,

and with my song I praise him.

8The Lord is the strength of his people,

a fortress of salvation for his anointed one.

9Save your people and bless your inheritance;

be their shepherd and carry them forever.

Shawn and Shanon(the director's at New Life House and Brush Creek) always talked about how God doesn't call the equipped. He equips the called. And believe me, I have felt everything but equipped these past two months. I've messed up. But here's what's so amazing about my God!! His mercies are new EVERY morning! And He forgives me even when I can't forgive myself! Isn't that just amazing?! I am so incredibly blessed to be apart of Teen Challenge! I know that even though I graduated the program a year ago that Teen Challenge did not end for me! I want to go to college after this internship is over but I know that I will go back to Teen Challenge one day! Praise the Lord for His grace and unfailing love!